It's definitely time to write another blog post. It's so refreshing to write and reflect. If you haven't written in your journal in a while I suggest taking the time out of your week to do it. Some of my best quiet times with the Lord, hearing from Him, is when I write. The reason I blog though is to encourage. I enjoy letting others see straight through my life if it gives them a chance to see something more beautiful in their own or something more breathtaking about Christ. I love the way the Lord uses words to bless others.
I've had a very busy few weeks but I've learned a lot about myself and the Lord. As I cried out to Him on Monday night, I was frustrated and alone. I was frustrated at others success. I was frustrated at others happiness and having things work out for them when my life seemed to be falling apart. I was comparing again. I have never had these feelings before as normally I am overjoyed by hearing from the ones I love the most how everything is working out for them. I was terrified at my feelings as I was upset at God too. I was upset about how many struggles He seems to be placing in front of me, instead of success and joy. I needed to refocus and change my perspective. I was missing out on a lot of the blessings He was placing in front of me. I looked at those blessings and thought they were struggles. Adversity builds character, right? He refines us like gold to become more like Him and I needed to stop and think about that. He was shaping me again and making me feel the way I did because He wants me for himself. He wants me to become more like Him. How beautiful is that? He wants us to become more like Him. Those moments when I fall on my knees in awe of Him are when I realize He has such a perfect and different plan for everyone.
Some people around me needed moments of joy and moments of great success and moving forward in their lives. God works differently with us all. I clearly needed a refocus week and also to be reminded of my gift of encouragement. It brings me such real joy to be able to bless others by encouraging them through my times of trial and being on my knees in pain. I have learned so much about selflessness through those times as I look to Christ for strength as I'm weak but He makes me stronger. I needed to be reminded of all the blessings He has placed in my life. I mean it's breathtaking. My jaw drops and my eyes water every time I stop and think about all He has done in my life. Thank you Jesus.
I realized my purpose had been lost that night as I cried out to Him in pain. I knew my tears were being held and my heart was in His hands. I believed stronger than I ever have that He is more than enough for me. It's such a powerful feeling to believe the statement that He is enough. Student teaching is exhausting even though I love my class and my teacher is a role model to me. I feel so overwhelmed to be teaching as I don't deserve to be there. The reason I almost tear up every time someone gives me a compliment or kind word is because of how much the Lord has done in my life. I can't believe it. This is all impossible without Him. I don't deserve this life I get to live. I don't deserve the friends He has given me. Yet, He blesses us time and time again. He blesses us by telling us we are HIS perfect gift. How mind-boggling to imagine the fact that Jesus calls us His children. He paid our price. He washed away all sin. He forgives. He loves always. No matter what. Wow. Take me all the way, Lord. You are more than enough for me. Thank you for all these beautiful reminders this week as six year old's would tell me, "Great job today, Miss Leonard on your teaching. You are finally getting the hang of it!" I laugh inside at these comments as I know it's all God's strength in me shining out. I don't know what tomorrow brings or what the future has in store for me but I know He is enough. He is all I need. There is nothing to worry about.
Count your blessings. You WILL be surprised at how much the Lord has given you. Don't waste your life searching for worldly things or feelings or plans. Search for Him. Seek Him. He is more than enough for you. Praise the Lord.
