I have successfully finished my first week of student teaching. Yayy!! I thought it would be an easier week as we had Monday off already and was excited to get started on this journey of becoming a teacher. I had no idea what lay ahead. I got through two days with a lot of stories to tell. Some stories were great and others made me realize how hard it is to be a teacher. Teachers are truly superheroes. I am blessed to be placed where I am in a wonderful 1st grade classroom.
Stressing out about all the things ahead and comforting myself and others through the first few days was draining. I was so worried about all the work I was supposed to get done and how on earth I was meant to finish it all. Here is when everything changed.
Day three hit and I was already exhausted and praising the Lord it was a Thursday. I was excited to get to school early and help out. On my way there I got into a car accident. I don't think I have ever screamed that loud before. All I really remember is wondering how I made it out of that car in one piece while looking at all air bags open and my entire bumper across the street. I felt no pain just then, only gratitude through my tears. I definitely believe in miracles. That incident does not need to be repeated, but let's just say it was something I hope to forget. The first thing I thought of as I opened my eyes was, "God, you must really want me here." How merciful He is to answer our prayers and be listening to everything I ask of Him. I had just prayed the night before with a friend to keep us safe on the roads as we drive and He listened in an odd way, but He listened. He kept me safe and everyone else involved. I needed a change in perspective and when everything changes all around us sometimes it is in those moments we look up. We look to Christ. I CAN'T do this alone. I am never trying to do this life alone.
Just like when we enter Jesus into our heart for the first time and everything changes, I felt like everything had so quickly changed. I can't trust in what I felt or feel like today. I can trust in Him and what I know and believe. I feel like I got beat up bad, but I know that I'm healed by grace. I feel like crying and never stopping, but I believe that He loves me so deeply that He wants me here a little longer. I know He holds my tears. I feel pain every time I talk or walk or move, but I know it's such minor pain in comparison to so many and in comparison to what worse could have occurred. I believe in Jesus and His comfort. I know that adversity builds character and this week will be added to my life story to bless others someday. Faith and this relationship with Christ is SO much more than just a feeling.
Don't get me wrong though, I was very upset at myself and God. I mean, seriously? What kind of timing do you have, God? Who do you think I am, superwoman? How can you think I can handle this, Jesus? I prayed for safety and this happens? I don't have time for this, God. The car was just bought and now it's crushed. All those questions filled my mind, but that is when I realized how BIG our God is. I had this overwhelming sense of His presence and peace. "Calm down and come to me, Sumi", I heard a voice say in my head. It was like Jesus was telling me STOP in the midst of my panic and chaos of thoughts and find rest in Him. I was overwhelmed by how much He cares for us. His plans are so perfect. His will is the way I want to live my life. He made me realize how much He loves me. What a miracle to be typing this and only have aches and pains and sores. God is good all the time. I am SO blessed to have a world of family, relatives, friends, and college professors and administration wrap their arms around me and comfort me. What a true blessing to have the best friends in the world and so many lovely people who care so deeply. I am overwhelmed by the love.
Everything changes when Jesus is the center. I know the rest of this semester is not going to be easy, but I also know I have a God who protects at all times and a God who goes before. This whole week was not how I wanted to start my 2015 year, but oh boy was it a reminder that whatever the future is: He sure has a great plan! There is nothing in this world He doesn't know and nothing I can hide from Him. I love the verse in Hebrews where it states that Jesus is the same yesterday, today, and forever. He is constant. When everything changes and the world looks like chaos and feels like chaos- look to Jesus. With Him ALL things are possible. With Him WE are changed. He is constant forever. That same God is deeply in love with YOU. Never forget that.
Looking ahead is not easy and if you know me well, you know it's definitely not easy for me. But I am determined to keep striving and get right back up again. I know the stress of others gets to me and the complaining of myself gets to me, but after this weeks reminder of life flashing in front of me I was reminded to treasure every moment. I'm ready to SHINE for Him. I'm ready to see what else 2015 holds. I want His plan. I need His plan. It is always the best. Thank You Jesus.
When everything changes....................... reach out and grab onto Jesus. He never fails.
Stressing out about all the things ahead and comforting myself and others through the first few days was draining. I was so worried about all the work I was supposed to get done and how on earth I was meant to finish it all. Here is when everything changed.
Day three hit and I was already exhausted and praising the Lord it was a Thursday. I was excited to get to school early and help out. On my way there I got into a car accident. I don't think I have ever screamed that loud before. All I really remember is wondering how I made it out of that car in one piece while looking at all air bags open and my entire bumper across the street. I felt no pain just then, only gratitude through my tears. I definitely believe in miracles. That incident does not need to be repeated, but let's just say it was something I hope to forget. The first thing I thought of as I opened my eyes was, "God, you must really want me here." How merciful He is to answer our prayers and be listening to everything I ask of Him. I had just prayed the night before with a friend to keep us safe on the roads as we drive and He listened in an odd way, but He listened. He kept me safe and everyone else involved. I needed a change in perspective and when everything changes all around us sometimes it is in those moments we look up. We look to Christ. I CAN'T do this alone. I am never trying to do this life alone.
Just like when we enter Jesus into our heart for the first time and everything changes, I felt like everything had so quickly changed. I can't trust in what I felt or feel like today. I can trust in Him and what I know and believe. I feel like I got beat up bad, but I know that I'm healed by grace. I feel like crying and never stopping, but I believe that He loves me so deeply that He wants me here a little longer. I know He holds my tears. I feel pain every time I talk or walk or move, but I know it's such minor pain in comparison to so many and in comparison to what worse could have occurred. I believe in Jesus and His comfort. I know that adversity builds character and this week will be added to my life story to bless others someday. Faith and this relationship with Christ is SO much more than just a feeling.
Don't get me wrong though, I was very upset at myself and God. I mean, seriously? What kind of timing do you have, God? Who do you think I am, superwoman? How can you think I can handle this, Jesus? I prayed for safety and this happens? I don't have time for this, God. The car was just bought and now it's crushed. All those questions filled my mind, but that is when I realized how BIG our God is. I had this overwhelming sense of His presence and peace. "Calm down and come to me, Sumi", I heard a voice say in my head. It was like Jesus was telling me STOP in the midst of my panic and chaos of thoughts and find rest in Him. I was overwhelmed by how much He cares for us. His plans are so perfect. His will is the way I want to live my life. He made me realize how much He loves me. What a miracle to be typing this and only have aches and pains and sores. God is good all the time. I am SO blessed to have a world of family, relatives, friends, and college professors and administration wrap their arms around me and comfort me. What a true blessing to have the best friends in the world and so many lovely people who care so deeply. I am overwhelmed by the love.
Everything changes when Jesus is the center. I know the rest of this semester is not going to be easy, but I also know I have a God who protects at all times and a God who goes before. This whole week was not how I wanted to start my 2015 year, but oh boy was it a reminder that whatever the future is: He sure has a great plan! There is nothing in this world He doesn't know and nothing I can hide from Him. I love the verse in Hebrews where it states that Jesus is the same yesterday, today, and forever. He is constant. When everything changes and the world looks like chaos and feels like chaos- look to Jesus. With Him ALL things are possible. With Him WE are changed. He is constant forever. That same God is deeply in love with YOU. Never forget that.
Looking ahead is not easy and if you know me well, you know it's definitely not easy for me. But I am determined to keep striving and get right back up again. I know the stress of others gets to me and the complaining of myself gets to me, but after this weeks reminder of life flashing in front of me I was reminded to treasure every moment. I'm ready to SHINE for Him. I'm ready to see what else 2015 holds. I want His plan. I need His plan. It is always the best. Thank You Jesus.
When everything changes....................... reach out and grab onto Jesus. He never fails.
